First Notes: Elizabeth Elliott's 5 Rules for Contentment

Dear First Baptist Family,

Yesterday I shared some thoughts about the missionary, author, and speaker Elizabeth Elliott (1926-2015). Her husband, Jim, was martyred while sharing the gospel with the Waorani people of Ecuador. Remarkably, Elliott kept serving and lived among the very people who took her husband’s life. 

As I learned more about her life, I wondered: How did she do it?

The answer is simple: her deep and abiding relationship with Jesus Christ. When asked how she could still live with such peace and contentment, Elliott answered, “The secret is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances.”

In other words, Elliott didn’t think that true contentment is found in favorable circumstances. Lasting joy and peace are available by trusting God’s goodness and character, which are rooted in an a solid relationship with Jesus.

Elliott hosted a radio show for many years and often referred to what she called “rules for contentment.” These were not original to her, but borrowed from a 19th century Anglican priest named E. B. Pusey.

Here are the five rules for contentment (adapted for modern language):

1. Never allow yourself to complain about anything.

Not the traffic. Not even the weather. Just don’t complain, period. 

1. Never picture yourself in any circumstance other than the one you actually have.

In other words, live the life you have been given. Don’t let yourself dwell too much on the circumstances you wish you had.

1. Never compare your lot with that of another.

It’s been said that comparison is the thief of joy. People compare themselves—their bodies, their relationships, their perceived wealth—to others all the time, but such comparison is fruitless. It only leads to a discontented heart.

1. Never allow yourself to dwell on a wish that something else had happened instead of what actually happened.

The past is the past. Yesterday is gone, along with yesterday’s opportunities, letdowns, and failures. If you want peace and contentment, commit to moving forward instead of looking backward.

1. Never allow yourself to dwell on tomorrow.

Tomorrow belongs to God. “…you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes” (James 4:14, NIV). Every moment you worry about tomorrow is a moment you’re not fully living today. 

Take a quick look at your life. Do you want greater contentment? Consider Elliott’s rules one by one. 

Are you prone to complaining? 

Do you spend too much time wishing things were different? 

Do you compare yourself to others frequently? 

Do you dwell on the past in a way that limits your present? 

Do you worry too much about the future? 

If any of these speak to you especially, pray about that. Ask God to help you to change. 

I'm taking a hard look at my own life as we study the book of Philippians together on Sundays during worship. I hope you will, too. I want more contentment and joy. I want the peace of Christ — not in the abstract, but as a lived experience. I'm praying for you and I hope that you’ll pray for me, too. 

With love,

Pastor Brent McDougal

P.S. We continue in our focus on lasting contentment and joy this Sunday with a message from Philippians 1:12-30. Pastor Paul Bagai will be preaching, but I will be present. I look forward to seeing you!